☈ strike #14 (action / voice)

[thestormishere]

[ After the whole fiasco with having to take down Jack Horner's dragon form, Lightning's been thinking a lot lately-- namely, about her own trouble with maintaining a human form and fallout from failing against her will several months ago- both things which, frankly, she's been trying to avoid.

However, she can't just keep ignoring it forever, can she? Especially considering that ever since then, even if she's continued to grow slowly stronger and is currently safe from the ramifications of an active l'Cie Brand... the 'penalty' she was saddled with makes using her powers a lot harder than how it used to be.

And so she practices, attempting to get a handle on the magic that's there but no longer instinctive like it once was. Healing magic is fairly easy to figure out, the weaker elemental things like Thunder and Water are simple enough if difficult to aim now, but as for the more complicated spells...?

As for learning new ones...?

She can be found alternately in the battle dome and outside near the edges of town quite a bit during these last few days, with and without her gunblade and various other weapons from before and during her time spent here. She's not really doing much actual fighting, though; it's obvious she's trying to do something, concentrating for sometimes minutes at a time, before casting something that just seems to flicker in the air around her, or light up the edges of her weapons with bright-colored energy.

After some time and a lot of deliberation, she turns to the journals. ]

-- Filtered to House Lucky occupants --

Hey. Have a minute?

-- - --

Comments

[gardenerofgaia.livejournal.com]

It...kind of did surprise me, a little. [She smiles hesitantly.] I knew that things have been hard for you, of course, but you always seem so composed. [She thought it was something Light wanted to deal with alone...well, maybe it was, but that didn't mean she couldn't put in more of a helping hand.] ...I'll need to look harder.

Would training help you relax? Maybe we should do an actual fight to blow off steam.

[thestormishere]

[ Have a tiny scoff at that first part- pretty much everything is bound to agitate her by this point, but you know... having the fact that she's usually a cool cookie pointed out isn't really helping the case for putting Lightning in a better mood. ]

I don't know.

[ Just training isn't something she's really capable of any more - not without using magic at all, considering even her idle strength was affected by being Branded. Being a l'Cie is an irremovable part of her now... and that's not something she really wants to be reminded of at the moment. ]

Maybe we should just leave... it's not like the magic's going away any time soon.

[ ... Wow, bitter. ]

[gardenerofgaia.livejournal.com]

Light...

[...Well, that does it for her smile, both the scoff and bitter tone. Frustrated and hurt, she looks upset for a second before she reins it in, closing her eyes and exhaling.

She's not going to let herself get in a bad mood about this, too. And right now she just feels guilty about everything that's led up to this--and those feelings need to go away before she can really think about how to make this better.]

Okay, let's go. No point sticking around!

[thestormishere]

[ And so 'leave' they do, Lightning in a tragically terrible mood still...

... Although it doesn't take long for her to start rethinking things. How much longer is she going to keep doing this- mired in her problems, lashing out at anyone who attempts to get close? As upset as she is... ]

-- I'm sorry. It's not your fault.

[ She doesn't look up, eyes narrowed at the ground as she walks, but still. ]

[gardenerofgaia.livejournal.com]

[She looks at Lightning from the side, her expression gentle.] I know. Thank you. [She does, but feelings are irrational--and it helps a lot to hear from Light that she isn't blamed.]

I'm sorry too. Sometimes I just don't know what's right or wrong to say to people. Tifa would be much better at this. I wish you could have been friends with her, too... [It would help, she thinks. Tifa had really cheered her up at times.]